If there's a god,
He's laughing at us
And our football team.

Effington could be a wonderful f'ing place
I can see it from the highway
And I'm wondering
Are they f'ing in their yards
F'ing in their cars
F'ing in the trailers and the backroads and the parking lots of Effington
Making my way to Normal, Illinois.

Maybe I should ditch this little white rental on the interstate
And start a new f'ing life...in effington
I could change my name, grow a beard, start a family
Or I could just keep moving on, moving on, moving on, moving on
Not stop 'til I get to Normal.

I want to live in Effington
I want to die there too.
Please bury me in Effington
In Effington
In Effington
Oh

I've got this movie in my mind of Effington
And the soundtrack to it sounds like this

I want to live in Effington
I want to die there too.
Please bury me in Effington
In Effington
In Effington
Oh

If there's a god,
He's laughing at us
And our football team.

And then the people who live in Normal
Can buy the movies that I'll make in Effinghton
That's what normal people do
Normal people do it too
Normal people do it too
Normal people do it
People do it
People do it
People do it

I want to live in Effington
I want to die there to.
Please bury me in Effington
In Effington
In Effington
In Effington
In Effington