Till death do us part,
Is what she told that preacher man.
Now she says this ain't worth dyin' for:
She's had all she can stand.
She's boxed up Momma's china:
It's loaded on the truck.
She just got started packing,
An I'm thinkin': "This could suck."

Now there goes my lazy-boy, my flat-top guitar.
Here comes her big sister: what's she' doin' in my car?
As they drive off to the city, I just wave.
From the top of my lungs, I hope she heard me say.

You ain't leavin', thank God, are ya?
You can't be gone fast enough.
An' what seemed to take a lifetime,
Just left in a cloud of dust.
This'll make my girlfriend happy:
She's the one that never thought you would.
You ain't leavin', thank God, are ya?
Let us pray you're gone for good.

Instrumental Break.

She forgot her new lap-top (Ahh.)
So I know she'll be back.
I'll have a hot-tub full of hotties, (Ooh.)
Icin' down a 24-pack.
She'll cuss me like a sailor, but I don't care.
I'll have a few choice words when I come up for air.

You ain't leavin', thank God, are ya?
You can't be gone fast enough.
An' what seemed to take a lifetime,
Just left in a cloud of dust.
This'll make my girlfriend happy:
She's the one that never thought you would.
You ain't leavin', thank God, are ya?
Let us pray you're gone for good.

You ain't leavin', thank God, are ya?
Let us pray you're gone for good.
Adios!